Starting from Right Here 🩷

I recently had the conversation with my mother—the one where I named the frustrations I carried from girlhood. It didn’t fix anything, but it felt like something had settled in me. Like a page had turned.

There was a time I thought I had to burn it all down to begin again.

Like in order to grow, I had to completely eliminate my old self.

Start from scratch. Reinvent. Reinvent again.

And then maybe—just maybe—I’d become who I was supposed to be.

But lately, I’ve realized: she’s still me.

The younger version. The survival version. The unsure-but-still-trying version.

She’s not gone—she’s just evolving.

I looked back at old photos recently and felt something I didn’t expect: motivation.

Not regret. Not embarrassment. But admiration—for a girl who didn’t have all the answers, but still showed up.

She wasn’t a mistake.

She was the beginning.

I’m Not Erasing Her—She Got Me Here

There are versions of me that were born out of urgency.

The one who said yes when she wanted to say no.

The one who overextended, over-explained, over-performed.

But I’m not ashamed of her.

She didn’t know rest yet.

She didn’t know softness was allowed.

She only knew how to keep going—and she did, even when it cost her.

And then there’s her—the version of me who went after everything she wanted with nothing.

She was fearless. Determined.

Life didn’t get in her way because she believed if she could think it, she could have it.

She didn’t wait for motivation.

She set the goal—and followed through.

Fierce. Unshaken. A force.

She knew exactly who she was.

I used to think I had to grow away from some of those versions of myself.

Now I know—I’m growing alongside her.

She’s not someone I’ve outgrown.

She’s someone I’m returning to—with more clarity, more compassion, and more power.

Starting From Here Looks Like…

This season doesn’t feel like a clean slate.

It feels like returning to the parts of me I had to put down just to make it through.

Starting from here means honoring what I already know.

It’s keeping the boundaries I’ve learned to set.

It’s trusting my capacity—without rushing.

It’s letting go of timelines, perfectionism, and the belief that I have to keep proving I’m worthy of rest.

I’ve felt shifts at 19, 25, and again now.

They say your frontal lobe doesn’t fully develop until your mid-to-late twenties.

I’ve lived every stage of that.

At 19, life began to unfold. I was a sophomore in college—the first in my family to get that far. I had always been a dreamer, able to see beyond my circumstances. But that year, something shifted. I started dreaming even bigger. I had no generational roadmap, but I finally had space to breathe, to choose, and to stretch those dreams into something real.

At 25, I had a bachelor’s degree, a master’s degree, a son who was growing fast, and new money I wasn’t used to seeing. I had created a life that looked impressive on paper—but behind the scenes, I was beginning to see what it had cost me. That year, I started recognizing the patterns I needed to break. The pressure I had normalized. The overworking. The silence. The way I held it all together without knowing what it meant to be held. It was the beginning of a quieter kind of unraveling—one where I finally let myself ask, “What do I really want?”

And now? I’m building with awareness—not urgency.

This version of me isn’t reacting. She’s responding. She’s designing. She’s steady.

This isn’t a blank slate.

It’s a lived-in canvas.

And I’m still painting.

No Shame. No Rush. Just Forward.

Sometimes we call it “starting over” because we’re afraid to admit we’re still figuring it out.

But I’ve learned—I don’t owe anyone an explanation for my pivots, my pauses, or my peace.

Every version of me brought me closer to myself.

And the moment I stopped trying to start over, I gave myself permission to just start from where I am.

From awareness.

From gentleness.

From clarity.

I’m not behind.

I’m not late.

I’m not lost.

Girl, Finally

Starting from here means I get to take my whole story with me.

Not to carry the weight—just the wisdom.

✨ New blog posts every Tuesday.

And yes—new prompts and voice notes are live now in The Girls Club.

Girl, finally—I’m not back at the beginning. I’m just starting from where I really am.